my Marie

How to choose a pet urn

I know that when you are experiencing the death of a very loved pet, the thought of how to best remember him or her is not the first thing that comes to your mind. Very often I get customers who still have their pet in the temporary container that they received from the cremation company. (don't worry, they return the ashes to you in a nice enough container, usually with a lovely card attached or a nice pouch)

You may not be able to think of what to do with your pets ashes right away. This is perfectly normal. The time will come (yes, it will) when you are strong enough again to start to give it some thought. Remember, I create urns for a living, and my dog Peekay, who died almost 5 years ago is still in his original tin from the crematorium. I still cannot bear to create an urn for him.

So, when you are ready, ask yourself the following questions:

* Where am I going to place the urn?

* Do I want to keep the collar, tags, toys?

* What most reminds me of him or her?

* How much am I comfortable spending?

These questions will help get you started in your search. Browsing the web will show you many more options than stores will, so you can see what is out there.

Some urns are mass produced, some are hand made. The mass produced urns are usually much more affordable if price is a concern. Hand crafted can take you to a higher price range. Keep that in mind when you are searching. Of course, I want you to purchase an urn from my Pet Urns, but there are some other really great urns out there. For custom ceramic urns you can go to Cheers Pottery. Ann and Jon are wonderful people. Please tell them I sent you.

My main recommendation is to keep in mind your little loved one. You are going to be keeping his or her remains in the urn usually permanently. So, does the purchase you are about to make reflect your pet's personality? Is it going to bring a smile to your face? Is it going to remind you of the joy and love you shared?

When buying or comissioning a pet urn, this is the most important thing to take into consideration.

I hope this helps,
Alexandra






When Placing Your Pet's Ashes in an Urn



Closure. It is such an important part of the healing process. It allows you to start to move on. To focus again on the future and not so much on the past.

When you are putting your pet's ashes in the urn, it is a good time to focus on closure.

The way to keep this experience positive is to create a ritual around the act.

-Gather up photos, toys, blankets, etc. that remind you of your angel.

-Invite a friend or more to help you.

-Create a temporary alter with things that are important to you.

-Find a wonderful poem, or some words that bring you comfort. If you can write your own, even better!

-Visualize the love you shared. Focus on caring for this last reminder of your angel.

-Focus on celebrating life.

There are many more ideas that you can incorporate into this ritual of putting your pet in it's final home, his or her special urn. Let it be individual, let it be something that has meaning for you.

If you have any other ideas to share, I would love to hear them!






My Mom's Urn

my personal urn story...



My dear, sweet mother died of cancer about 10 years ago now. That sounds so long ago compared to what if feels like. Three years sounds more accurate. Somehow, it is not.

I have processed it. And not. I don't know if I ever will, totally. Sometimes there are small things that bother you. Not important in the large scheme of things, but still...

So I have to get this off my chest. Especially in light of what I do for a living now.

We choose a wonderful urn for her at the funeral home. A marble angel that was just what she would wanted. It fit her personality perfectly, both visually and in spirit. It was very, very expensive.

After the cremation my sisters and I go to the funeral home to receive her ashes. The director comes out and brings us the beautiful urn with my mother�s cremains inside. We are heartbroken, we are disoriented, but we are glad to have 'her' in our care again. What happened after that was disturbing.

The assistant then hands us a big black plastic box, and says: "here is the rest of her". It was surreal. We had no idea that the urn we choose would not hold all her remains and they had to put the rest of the ashes into another box. No one told us. No one prepared us. It was a shock to the system, that has remained to this day.

I am not sure why I am sharing this story. I think it just still makes me angry that I did not know. I would not have wanted my mother in that black plastic box, she deserved more, and had we known, we would have given it to her.

My mom loved all things of beauty, she painted, she had horses, she adored being in nature, it was who she 'was'.

I know the spirit is gone, I know it is just a physical remains. I know it is not a big event. But somehow it insulted the love I have for my mom. My little, cute, adorable mom. Who walked on her tippy toes with her ponytail swinging. Who took me on countless adventures. Who I loved to hug more than anyone. Ever. I just have to say out loud that that little incident made me mad. And now that I have expressed it, I will let it go.

We all need to let go. Sometimes we need to be self expressed first.





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